I don't really know what to say.
I'm very unsure about everything...

Today wasn't necessarily a bad day, it was just different.

Well I was going to write a happy post until you called me dumb for not seeing that I am pretty.

Dry.





I just don't see it, I'm sorry. It'll take me some time to get used to the compliments.
I do not think you're lying, I think you are simply stating your opinion. I, personally, do not see it .
Every once in a while, I do feel pretty and maybe, with some time, I'll feel pretty all the time.

I had a strange dream last night.
I was at home with a certain someone.
We were in the basement, being all normal
And suddenly, I took off my clothes.
Within a few minutes,
My dad came home and said it was time for me to go to work.
I don't know how, but I left the house without my clothes and only my jacket.
I was panicking and ended up finding a shirt in my purse.

I went to work without pants.

Typical Katherine dream.

My ongoing quest for self satisfaction

Every few months, I get bored of myself. I need to change something, and it usually ends up being my hair. I am planning on growing my hair right now, but first I need a haircut that grow out nicely.
Here's what I'm considering:





I know the last picture is a cartoon, but I like it.

___________________


Wow, these girls on Teen Mom are so dumb. This adolescent has a baby girl and she says, "I do what I want, I don't care". If you want to be a normal teen and go out, DON'T GET PREGNANT.

I know it's awfully silly to say, but I still do not know how you feel. Like you said yesterday, we are so close yet so distant. I know I make you happy and I know you enjoy being around me, but are you sure you feel emotionally connected to me? I'm not going to lie, not knowing how you feel makes me feel insecure. We are able to tell each other stories about our childhood, things that bother us, little things we wouldn't tell other people. We are also able to cuddle for hours, but why is it that we're not able to tell each other how we feel? I have not felt this way about a person in a while and not knowing how you feel frightens me. I am not a person who opens up easily, it is hard for me to do so because I am afraid of being hurt. Last time I opened up to a person and let them in, I was hurt. (lol sorry, I was just watching tv and I completely lost my train of thought)
Not knowing how you feel, it's hard...
I don't think I'll be able to fully open up to you or accept how I feel with ease until I know how you feel...

As for school, fuck english. !@#$%^&

The long awaited happy post:

Well, I have no idea why the last few posts were so dark. We made it one month, could you believe that?! I never expected this to happen, I'm still in shock. I could not begin to tell you how happy you make me. Words cannot describe how you make me feel! Damn you and your adorable little jew waves and big, puppy-dog eyes.
Hopefully I'll be able to tell you how I feel soon, instead of writing in this damn blog.

I still cannot believe I teared yesterday, guess I'm just a little baby.

OH! On a side note, I got accepted to western's biomed! woohoo!

Let's pray I end with a 90% average for the $2000 scholarship! AH

Well exams are finally over, and 2nd semester is quickly approaching.

I only write in my blog when I am feeling emotional and cannot express how I feel to any particular person. A few people have this link, however I have no idea whether they read this blog or not. If you are reading this now, hi?

I am very tense, uneasy, worried. I cannot help but feel as though I did something to upset you. I know this may be silly, but usually you are a bit more chatty and if you are quiet, you are at least closer to me. Yesterday, you seemed quite distant for some time... I couldn't bring myself to tell you exactly why I was asking you if you were alright. Usually, you hold me but yesterday, things were different. I am not saying that we must always hold eachother, don't get me wrong. I found it very strange. Sometimes I ask myself whether you truly wanted to be in a relationship or whether you're happy in this relationship because all I want is for you to be happy. Maybe I'm just over-thinking things, maybe I should just relax but to do so, I need you to tell me how you're feeling. I need you to tell me in person, not just on messenger. You are quite different on msn and in person. On msn, you say things you normally don't say in person...


Goddamn Michelle, getting in my head with her "everything a guy says is a lie". !@#$%!@#$%^&^%$#@

I know you are a sweet and kind person, probably the sweetest person I know. I know you wouldn't say those things is they weren't true, but I have also realized you would never say those things if we weren't in a relationship. We would have never been together if you didn't come over that day. We probably wouldn't have been together if I didn't say anything.

I am really happy I am with you but I don't want you to be unhappy. Seeing you puts a smile upon my face. If I ever do anything that bothers you, tell me. I might be a little upset but I'd rather know about it so I can work on it.



Holy shit, what a long post.